A couple with their hands in the shape of a heart showing they built their relationship after a family conflict

How To Build Back Family Relationships After Family Conflicts

Most of the time, the family conflict never means much more than a minor disagreement. However, family conflicts can quickly spiral into a significant issue that causes long-term problems. Once it gets to a certain point, it can seem like no fix is possible.

How can a family relationship be built back up after significant conflicts? If both sides are willing to put in the work necessary, it’s possible to get back on track no matter the time in between. The talking it out approach works for many families, especially when keeping these essential points in mind.

Talking

As simple as talking seems on the surface, it’s one of the significant keys to rebuilding a relationship. Both sides must be willing to meet up face-to-face or through other methods depending on availability. If meeting up face-to-face is unrealistic, both sides are just a phone call or video chat away.

The bigger the conflict, the more necessary it is to spend as much time talking and meeting in person. Meeting in person might need to happen monthly or even weekly to ease into the situation and start talking more and more. Doing so keeps any conflict up-to-date and allows people to express themselves if dealing with anything new.

A typical fix families try and usually fail with is only meeting and talking about essential matters during the holidays or other times that don’t happen that often. There is a particular type of magic that constantly surrounds holidays, but the truth is that conflicts can grow way too quickly in this situation. 

Those times should be about enjoying each other and not worrying about conflicts if resolved beforehand, and then you can enjoy times with family during significant events even more.

Set Rules

Serious family conflict is inevitably very personal for both sides. When dealing with serious issues, discussions can get out of hand in a hurry. Emotions are bound to run high, which is why it’s so important to have set rules going in.

Setting these ground rules will ensure that the focus is on resolving issues. If someone breaks those rules, the other side can bring it up and pause the discussion.

What type of rules make sense? Many don’t want to deal with interruptions when talking. Both sides need to share their side of the story, and constant interruption is a quick way to make people upset. They then feel like what they are saying is only vital to them and no one else. 

Talking about unrelated topics gets the discussion sidetracked. It doesn’t help address the intended issues and focuses on something else.

Calling names is usually nothing more than one side being emotional. It’s a quick way to make someone else feel hurt. Don’t stoop to calling names, or it sets the entire resolution back.

Love

Expressing that love might be challenging when there is a massive conflict. Sometimes, figuring out a way to express love will be one of the quickest ways to solve everything.

Take the time to focus on the good when discussing with the other side. It might seem challenging, but it’s going to help ease the situation more often than not. It is the type of emotional discussion that people should lean on instead of trying to cause more trouble.

By telling family members that they are loved, it allows them to understand that some criticism is constructive and comes from a good place. It might take some time, but showing this love is a massive step in the right direction. It might trigger the other side to share their loving feelings, helping to clear up any misconceptions.

Listen

No matter what type of conflict a person is involved in, one of the huge keys to success is simply staying quiet and listening to what the other person has to say. Too many family conflicts are created by people not giving time to hear what the other side has to say.

It goes back to agreeing that there will be no interruptions when the other side is talking. Everyone’s entitled to their own time to talk, and staying attentive the entire time will show they care.

Stay Consistent

One meet-up is hardly going to fix the deep-rooted family conflict. There might be some initial agreement for both to move on, but the healing process needs more than that. Try to start with consistently meeting more often and talking about any issues. Even a small effort to improve the current situation can make a huge deal.

Too many people try to get everything figured out in just one sitting. That might work with a minor conflict, but anything intricate is not that easy. The good news is that families have the opportunity to work on issues and put in the time necessary to see success.

Final Thoughts on Molding Relationships Back Together

Ultimately, a person’s mental health will improve if both sides are willing to do the necessary work to fix family conflicts. It may not seem easy at first, but Elevations RTC helps families come back together by talking and spending the time necessary to make fundamental changes.

Stick with any repairing process, and it will start to get better and better. Most conflicts develop over the years, so attempting to fix them in just one sitting is wishful thinking. It takes time like anything, but the results are too great to ignore.